A Year in the Making

September 2022 - August 2023

• After our first video call to meet DeAndre I was advised to reach out to DeAndre's foster mother to talk with her and start having conversations to get to know each other. My first impression of her (I will call her Ms. R) is that she was a much older woman who knew DeAndre well and was doing her best to take care of him, the way she knew how. She was not very talkative but just straight to the point and did not go into a lot of detail about his life. 
• September 18, 2022 - I emailed DeAndre's case worker to let her know that we were confirming dates to go down to Texas to meet and visit him. Makala, his then-current case worker was soon to leave her position and another case worker would be assigned. I really liked Makala, so I was hoping this move would not make the placement process slower. 
• We made plans to travel to Texas October 21-24, 2022. I was super excited and also nervous to meet this little boy. I knew he had a lot of trauma from his past. Jameson was beyond excited to finally be able to soon have another sibling in the home. I was also making plans to visit my aunt Carol and cousin Tyrone that I had not seen in so many years. They are family on my dad's side. My dad's sister and her son. She has asked over the years when I was coming down to Texas, and so I could finally tell her I was coming 😀
• While we were waiting to travel for our visit, I received a call from DeAndre's CASA. CASA stands for: Court Appointed Special Advocate. Her name is Meme and she has known DeAndre since he was a baby. Throughout our entire foster/adoption process, Meme has been a great support for DeAndre and always there if we needed her for anything. 

ICPC

For anyone who ever goes through an out-of-state adoption or placement of a child that does not reside in their state, ICPC is a phrase that one will never, ever forget!! ICPC which stands for: Interstate Compact on the Placement of Children. The ICPC process is a VERY long and detailed process for children who will cross state lines for placement. The two states have to agree on all terms and conditions before approval. Now that DeAndre is finally home with us, I can say that the ICPC process is like hell, but I don't know if it was as bad as our Haiti adoption process. 

The worst part is that the folks on the ICPC team are people you can have no contact with while waiting for them to approve your placement. It's as if they are in an undisclosed location and families are at their mercy waiting for months on end. It's heartbreaking 💔

• We traveled to Texas to visit DeAndre October 21-24, 2022. Overall the visit went well. We flew into Dallas and drove about 3 hours south to a small town called Kileen. DeAndre lived in Lampasas, Texas which is an even smaller and very rural town. DeAndre and Jameson attached very well from the beginning. We had a good two days of fun. We took the boys to McDonalds, a fun park, we went out to eat, played putt-putt, had ice cream, etc. 
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  Leaving TX on our way back to NC